When someone has long-lasting back pain, the love and support of their partner can make a big difference.
But a new study from Penn State shows that being emotionally close to your partner can have both good and bad effects when dealing with chronic pain.
The researchers looked at 147 couples, all over the age of 50, where one person was living with chronic back pain. For 30 days, these couples filled out short surveys twice a day. They answered questions about how close they felt to each other, how much pain was being experienced, and how much stress they felt.
The researchers studied three types of closeness: emotional closeness (how much couples share their feelings), behavioral closeness (how much they do things together), and cognitive closeness (how much they feel like they think and act alike).
In general, previous research has shown that closeness in a relationship can bring many benefits like happiness, stronger commitment, and a lower chance of breaking up.
However, this new study found that when couples felt emotionally close on a certain day, they were usually more satisfied with their relationship—but there was a downside. The partner who wasn’t in pain also felt more stressed on those days.
It turns out that when couples are emotionally close, they can “catch” each other’s emotions more easily. That means when the person with back pain is having a really bad day, their partner may end up feeling just as bad emotionally.
The non-pain partner’s stress was linked to how bad the pain was, how much their partner was worrying about it, and how much it got in the way of everyday life.
Professor Lynn Martire, who led the study, said that being close is not the same as being satisfied. Some people might have a happy relationship without feeling emotionally close all the time. For couples dealing with chronic pain, this balance becomes even more important.
Martire believes that future programs could help couples learn how to be close and supportive without taking on each other’s stress too much. It’s all about finding the right mix between being emotionally connected and keeping some personal space.
This is just the first finding from the study. The researchers are now looking into how behavioral and thinking-based closeness (cognitive closeness) affect couples, too. They also want to see how these closeness levels change over time.
In the end, the goal is to better understand how pain affects both people in a relationship—and how they can help each other cope in healthier ways.
If you care about pain management, please read studies about Scientists find a new drug for chronic nerve pain and findings of Scientists find a new, less-invasive way to tackle knee pain.
For more about pain, please read studies about Scientists find a new way to manage knee pain and findings of Promising new drug offers hope for chronic nerve pain relief.
The study is published in Health Psychology.
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