Middle age can bring a mix of highs and lows—career changes, raising children, caring for aging parents, losing loved ones, and becoming more aware of our own mortality.
A new study from the University of Michigan suggests that how we approach these experiences may make a big difference in our mental health.
The research, published in The Humanistic Psychologist, focuses on a concept called amor fati, a Latin phrase meaning “love of one’s fate” made famous by philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche.
It’s the idea of embracing all of life’s events—both joyful and painful—with acceptance and even gratitude.
Study author Edward Chang, a professor of psychology at U-M, describes amor fati not as passive resignation, but as “a joyful, deliberate engagement with everything life throws at you, including suffering.”
His team found that middle-aged adults who adopt this mindset tend to have better mental health, especially when they feel socially connected.
The study surveyed 111 Americans aged 35 to 60, asking them questions about their attitudes toward life, their sense of social connectedness and loneliness, and their mental health.
Researchers measured two key aspects of mental well-being: “flourishing,” which refers to having positive experiences and a sense of purpose, and “languishing,” which is marked by a lack of such experiences.
Results showed that participants who scored higher on amor fati also felt more connected to others and less lonely—factors that were closely linked to flourishing.
Feeling socially connected also partly explained why these individuals were less likely to be languishing, though loneliness did not have the same effect in that part of the analysis.
Chang says this mindset can help reframe how we see challenges. For example, solitude doesn’t have to be viewed as something negative; both time alone and time with others can be meaningful.
Similarly, people in the “sandwich generation”—those caring for both young children and elderly parents—might find relief by seeing caregiving not as a burden, but as a continuation of what earlier generations did for them.
“Caring is a choice,” Chang notes. “And whether it’s for your children, your parents, or yourself, these acts of care are deeply connected to personal growth and fulfillment.”
The findings suggest that cultivating amor fati could be a valuable tool for building resilience during midlife, a stage often overlooked in mental health research. By learning to embrace—not just endure—the full spectrum of life’s experiences, we may be better able to thrive as we age.
As Chang puts it, “Middle age doesn’t have to be a time of crisis. It can be a time of deeper connection, greater meaning, and joyful acceptance of life in all its forms.”
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